It’s the beginning of the fantasy football season, and you still don’t have any team name ideas. You draft a San Francisco 49ers player and think that you know what you can do with that. However, it’s a lot harder than you think. And you come up with something lame, and your inner circle starts grilling you.
Luckily, this article is made possible so that you don’t have to deal with that embarrassment. So calm your nerves and your brain and let me take over for you.
49 or Die
Let’s say you draft multiple 49ers players. You become “that guy” that puts all of his eggs into one NFL team’s basket as if you forgot that they all have the same bye week.
In comes this name for when you don’t care what your fellow fantasy league members think of your maverick decision. You have four players on your fantasy team’s roster that are 49ers, and you couldn’t care less about the diversity. You will fall on your sword rather than letting your friends get to you. 49 or die all the way!
Colt 45 and a 9 mm.
If you want to have a bit of some word play in there, then you can get a little fancy with it. Sure the guys want either think that you have a life outside of your friend group that they don’t know about you. Or even that “this is so you.”
This is much like the last suggestion as you come in with some witty wordplay. Colt 45 meaning the 40-ounce drink sponsored by Memphis’ own, Juicy J. And nine millimeter involving the gun. It can strike fear into your opponents, as well as showing off your smarts.
You’d Better Hoyer Up
Using a bit of some wordplay (which is going to be a theme in this article), this name can be something in a bizarre scenario. It’s a play on “you’d better lawyer up.”
Let’s say that your starting quarterback goes down with an injury and you’re forced into free agency. It’s late in the season, and your league is a two-QB one. So you have to go ahead and get a final resort in Brian Hoyer.
Grab the Garçon
Pierre Garçon is the assumed number one receiver for the 49ers. It’s likely that you could end up with him as he is expected to have a big 2017 now that he’s back with Kyle Shanahan.
Garçon is also a name used for a butler or a fancy waiter. Basically, you’re going off of the basis of 1 percentage help. It’s not the best one, but it’s worth a try.
Hyde Yo Wife, Hyde Yo Kids
As much as you would think this would be at the top of the list, it’s a dead meme as the kids would call it nowadays.
However, you would look at it; it’s a classic. It’s a great part of YouTube history, and you can use it with Carlos Hyde if you get the chance to get him.
A Few Good Men for a Goodwin
Depending on whether or not your league has a character count for team names, this can work for if you have Marquise Goodwin. It’s not just about him as a player but as the team as a whole. Because isn’t that what fantasy football is all about?
Okay, some of these aren’t going to be good. This is obviously a play on words (curly and Kerley).
However, it would be foolish to sleep on Jeremy Kerley as many did in 2016. He had a strong campaign last year and should look to improve in 2017.
Kittles and Bits
If you’re all about the George Kittle hype (like I am for example), then you might end up getting him for your fantasy team.
There’s a reason why this works so well. It’s a play on Kibbles and Bits (I know his name is Kittle and not Kittles) plus it acknowledges the other players on the fantasy team. Not to mention, if for some reason the team has to resort to Kapri Bibbs at running back, then you can change it to Kittles and Bibbs.
Kittles: Taste the Rainbow
We all know what this is referencing.
Vance in Your Pants
It’s a play on Ants in your Pants. Yes, I do see the double entendre.
McDonald: Have it Your Way
You could use any McDonald’s slogan that they’ve ever used. Heck, you can even use Big Mac Supreme. However way you want it, McDonald is somebody that you should get for the tight end spot.
Scarlet and Gould
It’s a play on the both the team colors and the team’s kicker’s name. Robbie Gould is somebody that you can do anything with as far as the team name is concerned.
Stay Gould, Ponyboy
See what I mean? And this is a movie reference. Imagine how many more movie references you can make with this Gould’s last name. Plus, the guy is money as a kicker.
Honestly, nearly every team has a player named Taylor. Whether it be his last name or first name, there will always be a Taylor.
Trent Taylor might not see the field in 2017 as a rookie, but he is somebody that could make an appearance for the 49ers’ offense. After all, he is somebody that the cast from The League would call “scrappy.”
Juszczyk Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself
Much like the entry with Marquise Goodwin, this will require one that doesn’t have a character count.
You might be thinking, “but he’s a fullback!” Well, my friend, you’d be surprised to know that he’s working out with the tight ends as well. So if he ends up setting himself as a tight end for the team don’t be surprised.
Will you use any of these for your fantasy Team?
You might not think that you would need them, but if you want to impress, then you need to come through with something clever. Sure, some of these are much better than others (Naturally Kerley is the worst by far), but it’s important to come in with at least something.